How to Help Your Child
Handle School Anxiety
By Kama Timbrell

It happens every year. You
pass a sign shouting, “Back-to-School Sale” from
the storefront window or open the Sunday paper to find what seems like hundreds
of stories and ads urging you to “gear up.” Turn on the TV or look
online, and your family is confronted with the same message: It’s almost
time! It’s normal, of course, for kids to experience a little stress
this time of year. Some kids feel a nervous thrill at the prospect of going
back to school. Their hearts beat fast, their palms sweat, and questions race
through their minds: Will I like my teacher? Will I make new friends? Will
math ever get easier? Other kids get a little depressed when forced to confront
the end of summer and a return to their desks. But for children who suffer
from anxiety or a learning disability, or those going through a traumatic transition
(such as divorce or moving), the end of summer vacation can mean the start
of school anxiety.
These kids experience more
than the usual dread. They suffer mentally, emotionally and physically, and
their symptoms can range from general tension, headaches
and stomachaches to full-blown panic attacks. If you are concerned about your
child’s health or wellbeing, of course you will want to schedule an appointment
with your pediatrician or a trusted family therapist. You can also try these
tips from Diane Peters Mayer, MSW and author of Overcoming School Anxiety:
• Have your child
learn a new skill.
Learning a sport, foreign
language, or musical instrument, taking an art class, or learning to cook, knit,
act, sing or dance, etc.—these pursuits
increase self-worth, and classes help to build socialization skills.
• Curtail TV
and computer time.
Get your child engaged in educational interests and physical activity as
much as possible before he heads back to school.
• Enroll your
child in a yoga or martial arts class.
These activities teach breath control (diaphragmatic breathing), relaxation
and discipline. They also build physical and emotional strength and confidence,
all important for conquering anxiety.
• Create a family
scrapbook or album of the things you do and places you
visit during the summer.
Include photos, souvenirs and mementos. Have each family member write down
their experiences and thoughts relating to photos. This project will help
children who are struggling with reading, writing, and spelling practice
throughout
the summer in a fun way.
•
Visit the public library often for “story time” or other events.
Take out books and movies. Start a summer reading program for the whole family,
and add an incentive—for example, if everyone in the family reads a
combined total of so many books before school starts, the prize might be
a special trip
to an amusement park. When a book is finished, the reader tells the family
about the story. This builds verbal skills and is good practice for children
who are anxious about speaking out loud in class. Read to your child or take
turns reading books and poetry out loud as often as possible.
• Familiarize kids with a new
school and
what their day will be like.
Knowing what to expect can lessen or prevent first day anxiety. Drive your
child to the school, visit classrooms if it is open during summer months,
let her play in the fields or on the playground if possible, show your child
the
school website, and explain in detail what school mornings will be like (especially
for soon-to-be-kindergarteners). Reassure your child that you will be waiting
at the school or bus stop to greet her. Remember structure and routine feel
comforting and safe.
• Arrange play dates with a student a year ahead of your child at school.
This may help to lessen first day jitters. Be sure that the older child likes
school and can talk about the teachers your child will have and school work
in a positive way.
• Have your child help you plan meals, shop for the food and
cook.
Read cookbooks together, try new foods and seasonings. Your child will have
to use reading and math skills when shopping and cooking, a fun way for kids
to practice these skills in a relaxed setting (free from the stresses of
quizzes, tests and trips to the blackboard in front of the class). This is
also a great
way to teach a child about healthy eating. A good game to play when you both
shop for food is “Which is the better buy?” Teach your child
how to calculate which is cheaper, for example, a large jar of tomato sauce
or
two smaller jars?
• Do crossword and Suduko puzzles with your child.
Play card games too, such as Uno and Rummy, and have your child keep score.
Diane Peters
Mayer holds a Master’s degree in social work (MSW) and
is the author of Overcoming School Anxiety: How to Help Your Child Deal with
Separation, Tests, Homework, Bullies, Math Phobia and Other Worries (AMACOM
Books; July, 2008).
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